I am sitting up here. Its not VERY high. But its higher than the usual. And I like high spots. To be on top. To look down at the rest of the world. Not to look down with distaste. Nor with pride. Just fascination. To look at, without being looked at. Most people don’t look up to see. They are happy to just look back and look down or at the most to look ahead. So being up is good when you don’t want to be looked at. And it’s a funny kind of day today. There is a lot on my mind but nothing seems like it going to be implemented. I want to think about a lot of things but not do anything about them. Sometimes this world, with all its people seem just so unreal to me. Its like that movie Matrix. Sometimes I wonder if somebody is going to come up to me and say that all along I have been living in a virtual world, with people that don’t really exist., like its all been my imagination or something. Its like I am absolutely prepared to face that truth. If somebody told me such a thing, I wouldn’t be least surprised.
Well it’s a funny day and it’s a funny weather. The winter is bidding farewell and unlike its character, it seems itching to be on its way. And its afternoon. So its warm. Especially up here. The sun isn’t beating down on me. But it is giving off that “lazy warmth”. The one which makes your eyes drowsy and gives you a little ache just above your brow, and it takes you away to some far off place. A place which you left behind. Happy places. Where coconut trees sway in the breeze and the rustle of their leaves is the only challenge to the silence around you. And there is this song humming in your mind. About the boy who stood on the top of the hill, about arms being wide open, about first love…
If I close my eyes I see better. The images form better and I see vivid pictures. Memories and images stringed together randomly, rushing by like the midnight express train. And they don’t make any sense at first. But if I stare deep enough, they tell me something, remind me of happier, purer, innocent and honest days. And I lie down on my back. Spread my arms out…as if to hug the sky. I cant look the sum in the eye. But I see tiny dots when I shut my eyes. Floating dots scurry about and dodge each other. At first there were many of them – yellow, blue, green, orange. But soon most of them disappear. The orange ones like to stay the longest. And I take my shirt off and I lie beneath the sun. the sun makes me feel divine. Its unpurged ecstasy. And I want to lie like this forever, until the sky falls down on me.
Well it’s a funny day and it’s a funny weather. The winter is bidding farewell and unlike its character, it seems itching to be on its way. And its afternoon. So its warm. Especially up here. The sun isn’t beating down on me. But it is giving off that “lazy warmth”. The one which makes your eyes drowsy and gives you a little ache just above your brow, and it takes you away to some far off place. A place which you left behind. Happy places. Where coconut trees sway in the breeze and the rustle of their leaves is the only challenge to the silence around you. And there is this song humming in your mind. About the boy who stood on the top of the hill, about arms being wide open, about first love…
If I close my eyes I see better. The images form better and I see vivid pictures. Memories and images stringed together randomly, rushing by like the midnight express train. And they don’t make any sense at first. But if I stare deep enough, they tell me something, remind me of happier, purer, innocent and honest days. And I lie down on my back. Spread my arms out…as if to hug the sky. I cant look the sum in the eye. But I see tiny dots when I shut my eyes. Floating dots scurry about and dodge each other. At first there were many of them – yellow, blue, green, orange. But soon most of them disappear. The orange ones like to stay the longest. And I take my shirt off and I lie beneath the sun. the sun makes me feel divine. Its unpurged ecstasy. And I want to lie like this forever, until the sky falls down on me.
